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The playing field is narrower and you probably carry a little more baggage.

You also likely have fewer single friends, so there's more pressure to couple up. One of my girlfriends is 35 and she just married a 27-year-old.

If you recently became single or just turned 31 and are beginning to notice how dating has changed, you came to the right place. Their relationship works because they are madly in love and they support each other in the ways that they both need to be supported.

There are a lot of ways in which relationship dynamics have changed for the better in the last few decades.

Nearly everyone who is single in their 30s has dealt with some form of heartbreak—be it ghosting, cheating, or death. The third date is not a good time to discuss how your ex cheated on you for three years and you didn’t realize it until a scandalous photo was sent to you from an anonymous email account. Yes, your past has shaped who you are, but it’s your past—not your present or future.

When you’ve been in a lot of unsuccessful relationships, a natural defense mechanism is to put your guard up.

You’ll probably notice that there are common descriptors on the list.

The top qualities that you liked about these people are what you should look for in your next relationship. This doesn’t mean you have to pull one out and wear it.

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